I’ve known for some time that I can’t eat sugar. I’m addicted to it, plain and simple. But do I stop eating it? No. Well, maybe for a while. But then I start letting a little in here and there and pretty soon I’m back to where I was before. And, unbelievable as it may sound, wondering why I can’t lose weight. I feel like such an idiot. But then I remember that these behaviors are all the characteristics of an addiction.
I’ve just gone through a couple of weeks where I felt so listless and unmotivated and almost depressed. Every day I would try to do better, but never did. My weight loss from last month is almost obliterated. I thought it would help to write down the sugar I ate, as though seeing it would help me stop. But nothing, and I mean nothing, will make me stop once I start.
So, here I am again, promising myself that I will not eat sugar again. I will not put a molecule of table sugar in my mouth. And I’m believing myself, sort of. But then there is that little voice that is saying, mockingly, “Yeah. Been there, done that.”
Please pray for me. I’m so frustrated that this is so hard for me. I’ve been struggling with it for years and never coming out on top for long. I have all the head knowledge I need (and then some.) And I also have a real desire to help other people with weight problems, but I need to get victory over this myself first.
Okay? Okay. Now I’ll go back to being “Mom, who has everything under control.” 🙂
I understand what you’re saying. I feel the same way sometimes myself. Can you completely clean out the fridge and pantry of any of the offending items and stock up on easy to eat/prepare healthy fresh foods?
I can and should. It is unbelievably hard for me to throw away sweets. I have done it and felt good afterwards, but I’m still having an internal battle about that today. It is really just some candy hearts and a few bars that I made in a moment of weakness last weekend. You are right. If I just go and throw them away right now before I think any more about it, I would be heading in the right direction. And not in the garbage inside (where I could take them out), but in the outside garbage. As for the healthy easy to prepare foods, I have them. I actually eat really good between my sugar episodes. I do need to run to Kwik Trip and get more bananas, and that is on my schedule for later. But for now…. out with the candy hearts and bars. Thanks, Amy!
I can completely understand too. I don’t know how sugar can have such intense power… it’s strange. And I’m sorry to hear you’ve been having such a difficult time lately–I wish I could help… I don’t have any gems of wisdom or tricks since I seem to struggle with the same thing. Most days it’s simply keeping it out of sight and hoping for the best. Winter is definitely the worst time for snacking. Ugh. So, I’ll definitely be praying for you. I love you! 🙂
Well, Amy encouraged me to get rid of the sweets that were still in the house and I didn’t think I could (such a waste, you know), but I did. I just dumped those bars and candy hearts in the outside garbage can. So I haven’t had any sugar at all (unless you count what is in Greek yogurt and almond butter, but I don’t) since Friday morning. I’m feeling rather confident that I can do this. Yesterday I spent hours revising my menus and I am determined to stick exactly with them. It is easier for me to have menus, because it eliminates so much decision making. I know I posted about that before. But if I try to do the same ones over again, even if it is a 4 or 5 week cycle, I start to not stick with them the second time around. So, for me, the trick will be to make new ones when these run out, rather than planning on “recycling” them. BTW – we had pulled pork on diet buns for supper – smelled good cooking all afternoon and was oh, so good! But I only had one. And I’m already looking forward to the other one tomorrow night when we eat up the leftovers. I get a sweet potato then, too, which I adore!
What a smart idea–to keep rotating your plans for new things. I find that I do best when I just make myself eat what I plan as well. Right now I’m still sticking with my spinach smoothie for lunch which is working well. Most days I don’t want to eat it, but I still do. I just drink it as fast as I can and then get myself out of the kitchen. 🙂